Body-language and nonverbal communication

Parents in U.S. and China both lie to their dids, study says

Parents in the U.S. and China both lie to their kids, study says

„If you don`t come with me now, then I will leave you here alone“.

This is the most popular lie in USA and China, to make children to behave in a “proper” way, that means in the way the parents want them to behave. Some parents, so is the result of some new scientific study, even threat their children with their own death.

A client of mine told me some day another way how her mother tried to gain complete power on her daughter when she was young. She wanted her daughter not to lie. Thus she tried to obtain this power on her daughter in a cruel way.

With complete success as the daughter ……….told me in a therapy session.

When she as a little child had to look into the eyes of her mother to tell her, that she did not lie, the mother told her the following story in a way that the little daughter believed this for true:

“if you (my little daughter) look into my eyes and see a little man in my (the mother`s) eyes then you told a lie. This is the proof for (you) telling a lie.”

As grown up you know of course the fact that you will always see a little person in the other`s eyes when looking into his eyes. Because: it is you being mirrored in the other`s eyes.

I think it is perfidious to say this to your child. The client of mine therefore suffers for all her life from an internalized feeling of “I always am a lier”. It is perfidious because the client never felt a good Self within herself. And this of course influenced and traumatized all her life.

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