Body-language and nonverbal communication

German romanticism….

German romanticism….

German romanticism….….and Chinese!

It feels like this when I imagine Germans and Western people feeling excluded like me as I told you yesterday. Excluded  by this so charming Chinese smile of a group. Watching the group, looking for some kind of contact, but just facing this smile.

I know about the importance of the group in Chinese social life. I know about the role of group cohesion and it´s relevance for social behaviour, for social functioning and I know about the role of group identity which gives personal orientation. Which also carries personal identity. Which shapes and characterizes identity at all. – In China……………………….

Which impression, which effect do I have on this group of Chinese when they see me and know about my seeking, my longing for contact? When they see me as a single person only. Without a group, without my group besides me. —- Do they laugh at me, I ask myself, when I look into their smiling faces? For what kind of a person will they think me to be? How strange? How odd?

How suspicious must they feel about me, because I am there without a group? Just alone.

Suspicious because I am so different.

Well, we in Germany are more ego orientated, more ego based communicating. We in Germany live in groups and also as a single person, as an individual on it´s own. We are ego and individual at the same time. As an individual I face these Chinese in their group and think that it would be nice to come into contact, just to talk a little, just to laugh together andsoon.

And then, after some time, leave the group and go home. With my smile on my face. Walking home alone. – And being glad.

But there is not this contact. Not this connected smile bewtween a Chinese group and a single German.

I still look at this smiling group or those group fotos and I realize a gentle and tender romantic smile in me.

A with-you-smile but not-connected-smile.

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